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25-Sep-2019 22:41

Sometimes I entertained it a tad longer, convincing myself I was young and ought live in the moment.

But, it felt unnatural and I wasn’t interested in ‘alternative’ types of relationships. For the next few years I found myself stuck in this cycle of one or two casual dinners and topline conversations with the exception of one short-lived promising prospect.

What was once intriguing to me had become a game of mastering poker faces; I nodded when I was supposed to nod, laughed when I was supposed to laugh, awkwardly hugged and rushed home to write a confessional ‘I can’t do this anymore’ email.

I realize that’s not the way it usually goes, but I never had the heart in me to carry on with something I knew wouldn’t go anywhere.

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